My First and Second Girlfriend

Becky Meriwether.

To me, this girl was just a name. Just a piece of artwork on the board proclaiming to all other art students that she was better than I at art because my work was NOT on the board. One of those "natural" artists that so many of us like myself were jealous of.

Then second semester of my Freshman year rolled around and I had a class with this person. Upon getting to know her, I realized that she was not some stuck-up, snobby artist at all, but that she was a pretty cool girl. She even struggled at getting her drawings right sometimes and would conveniently place flowers to cover hands (haha, sorry Becky, couldn't resist).

Well, freshman year turned to sophomore, then turning to junior year. Each year having more and more classes with Becky - getting to know this girl more and more. At the end of our junior year we began to do things outside of class together (actually, it started with a date to the Varsity Commons earlier, but that went NOwhere). Things progressed between us and a relationship began. As the relationship began though, the school year came to a close. Because of my cautions and the distance that I knew summer would bring, I didn't officially ask her out until we returned to school the following fall for our senior year.

September 23, 2000. I ordered roses, had called her parents and asked for permission, and the night went off pretty well - and by night's end, I had my first girlfriend. Yes, as a 21 year old guy, this was my first girlfriend. There were interests when I was younger, but my philosophy of dating among other things, kept me from getting serious to the point of an official relationship until this first, my senior year of college.

We spent our senior year together, living the life of a PCC dating couple. About 6 months into our relationship my heart felt like it had changed. I was struggling each time it came time to tell this girl those three life-changing words "I love you." I didn't feel like I could say it and truly mean it, but yet I didn't want to break up with her and hurt her, so I tried to stick it out, figuring my emotions would catch up with me.

This could only last for so long. I was being torn up inside and I knew it was not fair to either of us to continue, so on one Sunday afternoon in April of 2001, I broke up with my first girlfriend. I was determined to remain friends and that the breakup was only temporary; however, the more time that went by, the more and more it seemed like a permanent arrangement. The only problem was that I could not get her out of my mind. I tried to go on dates with other girls - and did. But each time, I compared them back to Becky and they all fell short. I couldn't understand why I kept doing this - it didn't make sense to my understanding.

Fast forward to the summer of 2002 (yes, over a year later). I was in my summer of seminary classes, Becky was home for the summer as were all of my other friends - and I was determined to make sense of my emotions that summer and either forget Becky for good, or pursue her once more. After some very timely, and wise advice from my parents, I began the pursuit. It began as an email, then a phone call, then a visit to South Florida. It took a bit of convincing on my part that I was serious, but eventually she was "won over" and we both decided to do our relationship right the second time around. We spent one night a week together overlooking the bay, sitting on a wooden pier, sharing our hearts and praying together.

One of those nights, on November 7, 2002 I once again did the whole roses, calling the parents (that was really hard a second time), and asked Becky Meriwether to be my girlfriend. So, there you have it, my first and second girlfriend - both the same girl!

This time around, I was more ready for what God had for us, and on May 5, 2003 we became engaged, with an April 10, 2004 wedding date looming.

The next 10-11 months were spent mostly apart with me working and looking for a job and a place to live, and her planning our Florida wedding. We were married on April 10th, honeymooned in the mountains of Tennessee, and moved to Haddon Heights, NJ to begin our life together as one.